My Jacked Up Goodbye
How I left my lead pastorate after only six months
Six months ago, I loaded up my life and moved 2,500 miles to step into a new calling as a lead pastor. I wasn’t naïve—I knew the path of ministry is rarely straight. I thought this might be my last pastorate. It still might be. But I didn’t expect that yesterday, I’d be preaching my final sermon to that congregation so soon. You can watch the sermon here if the embedding below doesn’t work for you.
If you just want the gist (the TL/DR,) it was a sermon about Paul and Barnabas—two faithful friends and gospel warriors who found themselves at a crossroads, a "sharp disagreement" that led them to part ways. They didn’t hate each other. They just couldn’t keep walking the same path. That’s where I’ve found myself—standing at a holy impasse, saying goodbye not because of failure, but because of irreconcilable differences with lay leadership over vision, mission, style, and methods, yet also with a deeper trust in God's map over my own.
Years ago, this kind of exit would've crushed me.
I would’ve spiraled into fear, temporarily changing who I was to avoid losing my position and employment or separated but under the crushing weight of shame thinking, “What did I do wrong? Why didn’t this work out? What will people think?” But I’m not shaken like I would’ve been back then. I’m actually at peace in a way that surpasses all understanding. Why?
Because years ago, I let God jack up my life in the best way possible.
A “Mayday” for the Jacked-Up Life
This is why I’m especially grateful to announce something that feels incredibly timely: my new book, The Jacked Up Life: When Guilt, Failure, and Shame Shakes Your Foundation, releases May 1st.
Yep—May Day.
The old distress call. The shout from the deep end of life: "Mayday! Mayday!"
And if that’s you right now—if you’re crying out through the static of fear, shame, regret, or confusion—this book was written for you.
Whether you’re standing in the rubble of a failed plan, a broken relationship, self destruction, or a spiritual identity crisis, The Jacked Up Life offers a way forward—not by pretending everything’s fine, but by tearing up the cracked foundation and replacing it with something eternal and up to code for living in a broken and jacked up world.
This book was birthed in the messiness of my own story—years of trying to manage appearances, avoid pain, and earn acceptance. I know what it’s like to live with guilt so heavy it feels like it’s fused into your DNA. But I also know what it’s like to have your identity rebuilt by grace instead of shame.
And now, even as I walk through yet another unexpected stormy transition, I can say: I'm not undone. My house is still standing.
Your Life Might Be Jacked Up, Too
I’ve met too many people who think they’re the only ones living in a construction zone. They look around and see everyone else’s highlight reels and feel like the only one whose life is "beyond repair."
But here's the truth: being jacked up isn't the end—it might be your new beginning.
Just like the mission of Paul and Barnabas didn’t collapse but multiplied after their split, your "ending" might just be a divine rerouting. And God is a master of using even the most crooked lines to write beautiful stories; he still writes in cursive!
So What Now?
I don’t know what the next chapter holds for me vocationally. I promised my wife Hayley that after this pastorate was over, I would take her on a cruise around the Mediterranean but I thought that would be years from now. Looks like we’re going sooner than I thought! I do know this: the foundation has been poured. It’s cured, level, and solid. And it’s not built on titles, positions, or expectations. It’s built on the unshakeable grace of God.
I invite you to join me on May 1st. Not just to buy a book, but to step into your own restoration story. If you or someone you care about is in a Mayday moment, I believe The Jacked Up Life will speak directly to you.
Because no one is too far gone.
Because shame doesn’t get the final word.
Because being jacked up might just be the best thing that’s ever happened to you.
The preorder page for The Jacked Up Life for Kindle is up now or if you want a print copy of the book, subscribe to Godguy.com…
and I’ll send you a reminder on May Day when the print book listing goes live, and let’s start jacking up our lives intentionally to re-pour the foundation with the grace that can change everything.
Your mayday is coming (if not already here)—but so is help and hope!